There are a billion ways to have sex. This is a basic how-to guide for baby dykes, beginners of any age, straight boys who want to be better lovers, women of any sexuality who want their partners to step up her/his game a little, etc.
If I get around to it, I’ll post an intermediate and advanced level that cover more advanced topics like anal and fisting. Don’t get excited, get the basics down first. If you have great ideas for better basic sex, leave them in the comments. Enjoy!
- Take your time. Control the pace.
- Kiss.
- Caressing and hugging are the best. Run your fingertips over every square inch of her skin. All the way down her legs, and all the way back up to the nape of her neck.
- More hugs and cuddles and kissing. Scalp massages are wonderful and intimate.
- Make her do a strip tease for you. They can be great fun, especially if you’re both embarrassed by the idea. When she reveals any part of her body, compliment it. She’s showing you more than her skin, appreciate it.
- When you’re both naked, rub your nipples on her back, tummy, thighs, ears, neck. Just your nipples. It leaves the promise of the whole boob just out of reach and builds desire. (I’m an A cup and I can pull it off, so don’t hold back.)
- Biting, gently, on her shoulders and butt arouse her. Everyone has a different threshold, so increase pressure and feel her response.
- Repeat #3 until you feel heat radiating from her skin.
Domme Foreplay:
- Make demands with reason: “Give me a lap dance. Your dances turn me on more than anything.”
- Appreciate what you see. Women work hard to look good, butch, femme, tomboy, etc, are all carefully crafted looks. Compliment what she’s worked on.
- Use your eyes as well as your words. Your eyes should express everything in your head. Hold nothing back. She wants to know how she affects you.
- Taking charge should never be abuse. Everything you do should please her desire to please you.
- Respect her. If you don’t, you’re not a domme, you’re an asshole. Humiliation is a fine line best reserved for advanced phases after clearly establishing what she considers sexy.
How to eat pussy:
- Get a warm, wet washcloth and stroke her crotch slowly. You don’t want to find any … leftovers down there. So awkward. Make a slow, sensual motion with light but firm pressure. She will enjoy it.
- Tell her to spread her legs. Some girls like it playful, “Spread ‘em, bay-bee,” while others like a command, “Spread your legs for me. Wider. I like that.” (Don’t forget that a face-down, butt-up position is a great option for eating pussy. It also allows you to transition quickly to finger fucking for that very-important second/third/fourth orgasm.) (Yes, straight girls, there are multiple orgasms.)
- Start very slowly and look at her the whole time.
- Lick from her butthole to her clit with your tongue as broad and flat as you can make it. SLOWLY. Then drop back down, and back up one side, down the other, repeat until her juices flow.
- Do the same thing going from side-to-side. Stroke her legs.
- Munch GENTLY on her labia, then go back to #3 and start over.
- Have a look inside. Lick it, smell it, tell her she’s gorgeous inside.
- As she heats up, suck her clit GENTLY, then release. Suck, release, suck, release. When she’s about to hit you for teasing her too much, suck it in and flick it with your tongue while sucking, repeat #3.
- Add to #4: push your face into her pussy as you go up and down, get her juice all over your face, eyebrows, nose, chin. The taste of a woman has no equal. Savor it.
- Repeat steps 3-8 until she wants to come. Either edge her (keep her on the brink of coming) or face-fuck her (#9 with increasing speed) until she turns to jelly.
- Tell her to look you in the eye when you want her to come. The connection is electric. If you have her face-down, butt-up, and can’t make eye contact, grab a fist full of her hair and pull gently but firmly. Also, scratching her back from the shoulders down has been known to produce an alarming O.
Fingering:
- Trim those nails. They don’t have to be down to the quick, but no sharp edges. And make sure they’re clean. (You can tell the fake porn stars from the real ones by their nails.)
- Starting out, spit on your fingers and rub her labia until you feel her cream coming out. Slow, soft strokes, the longer the better. You can rub with your whole hand/wrist to make long, wide strokes.
- Tell her to get on her hands and knees, or if you’re standing, turn her around, back to you, and make her spread her legs wide. This angle gives you more options for taking your time, getting the right angle, and squeezing/hugging/feeling her from behind (another girl-pleaser).
- Have a look inside. Lick it, smell it, tell her she’s gorgeous inside.
- Penetration makes or breaks the session. Penetrate slowly, then pick up speed. Add a second finger and, if she feels loose, a third. Your fingers should arc slightly upward (where the pubic hair is), pressing against the top of her vagina.
- When she’s breathing hard, pull out. Ask her, “Who knows how you like it, baby?”
- Repeat 4-6. Keep talking dirty, and get increasingly dirty. Know your girl, some like degrading, “What? You like this? You queer slut!”, and some like it sweet, “I’ve never had a girl as beautiful and wet. You’re so wet. You’re turning me on!”
- Pick up speed and add a finger curl as if you’re trying to scratch the underside of her clit. When she’s breathing hard, you can try repeating #6, but be warned: she might bite you
- Vary your speed to edge her — but be merciful.
Be sure to know your girl before having sex. Gay girls have lower rates of STDs than the general population and that leads some of us to think we’re invincible. We’re not.
Happy sexing!
Xoxoxo,
Ingrid
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